Querida Creativa

All the times I’ve been in an interview for a job or meeting someone new, it’s hard for me not to mention that I sing and write songs. That’s why I’m there—to fuel my dream. Most people respond with, “Oh, that’s nice,” which I hear as, “Oh, that’s a cute hobby.” I never take it personally, though, because I would probably think the same thing. It isn’t until they see a show or my social media that they go, “Ooooh, you SING SING.” Yeah, baby, I’ve been trying to tell you.

People’s reactions to our passions and aspirations are none of our business. But they can stir up self-doubt, especially if we’re older, have kids, are in school, are married, etc. As humans, we are wired to seek safety and avoid risks. So our brain automatically shifts into doubt mode:

“I’m X years old; who is going to want to listen to me?” “Nobody cares what moms have to say… especially a young one.” “I’m studying something that can actually make me money. Why would I keep pursuing what may actually just be my hobby?”

The doubts can go on and on. However, we have to remember that what other people think about our creative endeavors—and even what we tell ourselves sometimes—is none of our business. Let me take it a step further: your own doubts, or what you think are your own thoughts, have been fed to you. You don’t have to listen to them. It’s okay to acknowledge them without ruminating on them—just in case nobody has told you that before.

The Pressures

I understand the pressures from society, family, and social media. But we don’t have to abide by them. Just because you feel tension when you go against what is expected of you—or even just do something different from those around you—doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be doing it. This is where discernment and self-awareness come into play.

Starting this blog is the best personal example I can think of. Podcasts and blogs are part of my daily car rides and workdays. My favorite time of day is my commute to drop my little guy off in the morning. It’s when I feel the most alert, awake, and productive. It’s my me-time—just me and my coffee, learning something new or listening to someone’s story. But I wanted to find a podcast that spoke to creatives, specifically women creatives, and even more specifically, Latina creatives. I couldn’t find one that truly resonated with me, so I moved on with my day.

But then, I felt a conviction to create the podcast/blog I was searching for. I had tried launching podcasts before with no success. I told myself there was no way I had time between my personal life and my music. No way I could add this to my plate. So I pushed the idea aside. But two weeks later, the thought came back. It wouldn’t leave me alone. That doesn’t happen often, okay? So I thought, this has to be something God is calling me to do. I decided to obey, do my best, and stay consistent. Before launching, I wanted to do everything the right way—create a plan, build the website, make it look how I wanted, write a few blog posts in advance, and record some episodes. This time, I would be prepared. And here I am.

I’m really proud of my choice to start this, even though it felt impractical. I’m about to give birth to my second child, I’m releasing more music this year than ever before, and I have about 18,249,328 other responsibilities. But this project fulfills me in a way that music alone doesn’t.

Dealing with setbacks

And if you read my last blog or listened to my last episode, this is part of the journey, ok? There is nothing you can do about setbacks besides get back up y a darle mas duro, mami. Stop trying to be perfect; you never will be. And stop freaking out and spiraling when you get off track.

Growth is not making yourself feel guilty. It is analyzing what threw you off, accepting it, learning from it, and back to action.

Let’s get personal. The summer of 2023, I had just released my song “Serendipity” with its music video and I was super happy with it. I had worked so long on this song and a lot of people were involved in making the music video look amazing. But shortly after, I felt lost. I felt pressure. So long story short, I just stopped trying to pursue my music career (kind of… I never fully did). I stopped posting on social media. I stepped back from music to ask myself if I even really wanted the dream like that anymore. And at that season, the answer was no. I wanted my family. I wanted to be a better mom. I wanted to enjoy being and living without feeling like I was chasing a dream that I could never get to or felt like wasn’t even mine anymore. So the fall and winter of 2023, I can’t recall doing much creatively. But by the spring of 2024, I saw a music business program that was being offered in my city. I applied and said, if I get in, then we’re back, Jesse. And I got in.

The whole point of me sharing this pause with you is because it actually didn’t set me back. Those six months of rest and analyzing what I really wanted for my life were crucial. Because of that, I am more aligned with myself as an artist. I don’t need anybody to tell me my song needs this or that. I don’t need approval nor do I want it. I know and believe that my audience is out there and that I will find them. Todo a su tiempo. And because I took the time to build this strong mindset as an artist and figure out my why again—yes, it changes over time—I came back to my creativity with so much more freedom, flexibility, and my creativity and artistic self thank me in return by giving me ideas, inspiring me, and letting me be me.

So be kind to yourself—when you’re tired, when you’re too busy to even think about your craft, when you simply don’t want to do it, when you think you’re not made for this, or when you think that your creativity cannot be enough to sustain you. Take a breath and tell yourself that it’s okay and that there is time. Because as much as we want to make sure we get things done, we also want to make sure that we’re enjoying doing it and we’re doing it out of pure love and intention and not pressure, heaviness, and stress. Nada sale bien así, and you know it.

If you want to overcome self-doubt, try this:

• Identify Negative Thought Patterns: Shake your head and say, “This isn’t mine nor is it for me.” Keep doing this until it becomes second nature.
• Celebrate Small Wins: Write down everything you accomplished today, no matter how small.
• Visualize Success: Take 3-5 minutes daily to visualize your dreams. Faith is believing in what you can’t see yet.
• Create a Support System: Build a village of people who uplift and hold you accountable.

If you feel like you’ve failed, chill. It’s just a setback. Growth isn’t about guilt; it’s about learning and moving forward.

Be kind to yourself. Your creativity will pursue you just as much as you pursue it. Believe in it, because it’s yours. Keep pushing, amiga.